As a farm kid who grew up sleeping 3-4 cousins in a bed with lots of night play, I never really came out as such! But call me queer or faggot and I bashed back until you either killed me or ran. I am queer because at Stonewall it rang in the air and my heart and later with queer theory & liberation. But I agree that everyone gets to self-identify on their own terms, just as a fag is a cigarette in the UK, but a foot in the groin from me!
DOC AND RAIDER 
You said it better than I could. Thank you.
As a farm kid who grew up sleeping 3-4 cousins in a bed with lots of night play, I never really came out as such! But call me queer or faggot and I bashed back until you either killed me or ran. I am queer because at Stonewall it rang in the air and my heart and later with queer theory & liberation. But I agree that everyone gets to self-identify on their own terms, just as a fag is a cigarette in the UK, but a foot in the groin from me!